“Hi, Ren” (The Full Series)
An Overview, A Look at Reaction Videos, and The Psychological and Spiritual Dimensions of the Genius Song “Hi, Ren”
An Overview, A Look at Reaction Videos, and The Psychological and Spiritual Dimensions of the Genius Song “Hi, Ren”
Note: This is all three parts of my three-part series on musician Ren Gill, his musical and visual masterpiece “Hi, Ren” and the impact he is having on people. Part I is an overview, Part II is focused on the Reaction Videos to “Hi, Ren,” and Part III, examines the deeper psychological and spiritual meaning of “Hi, Ren” through the Native American concept of Wetiko (and as if that wasn’t all enough, I wrote a poem about Wetiko). There is nothing new here, this is just meant to put all three posts together for easier reading of the full series.
“Hi, Ren” Examined (Pt. 1: The Overview)
The Many Lessons of a Modern Musical Masterpiece
Introducing Ren: A Galaxy-Heart, Empathetic Genius
When I was in high school in the late 1980s and obsessed with horror fiction, especially Stephen King, I remember browsing the horror section of a bookstore and seeing a blurb on a book that read: “I have seen the future of horror and its name is Clive Barker.”
Over-the-top? Indeed. But I did buy that book, Hellraiser, and Barker was, indeed, a supremely talented writer with an extraordinary imagination.
Well, as a music connoisseur, today I’m aping that blurb to say, “I have seen the future of music and its name is Ren.”
Specifically, Ren Gill. He’s the following and so much more: a British singer-songwriter and rapper; a phenomenal guitarist; a writer of ingenious rhymes, perfectly-timed beats, and theatrical lyrics; a musical bard and a storytelling genius; a deep Soul diver and Lyme’s Disease survivor who has been through the wringer; and a singer of emotional range from the highest joys to the most crushing pains.
In some of the online worlds I inhabit, there is the concept of “galaxy-brain thinkers” such as Daniel Schmachtenberger and Jamie Wheal who are doing important work to help us make sense of our world mostly through the intellect.
For Ren, I’d like to coin a phrase: “galaxy-heart performer.” Ren uses his musical talent and skill, and his lyrical, musical, and visual storytelling to engage the listener as he fully inhabits wide-ranging characters from a place of deep empathy and profound psychological understanding. By doing this, he is breaking open the hearts of those who find his art, creating connections between us in a time when making heart-based connections may be the one thing that saves us from ourselves.
It’s been 14 days since this reaction video to Ren’s epic one-man minstrel show masterpiece, “Hi, Ren,” jumped out from my YouTube front page and I’ve been drowning with absolute pleasure in the seas of Ren ever since.
I’m far from alone. Go to just about any of Ren’s videos for his wide range of songs, reactions to his videos, or posts like this one in his community on his YouTube page, and you’ll read comments like this from a YouTube user named HeatherBee:
“It’s nearly impossible to put into words the feelings your songs evoke. You are a true genius, artist, songwriter, lyricist, performer. It’s mind-blowing to know there is so much talent in one person. Thank you for sharing your gifts with the world!! I wish you all the best. BTW, I’m turning 59 years in a couple of weeks and can’t remember feeling this excited about a musical talent.”
About a dozen of the members of the online community I spend most of my online time in have been equally exploring the seas of Ren with me, and I can confidently predict that by writing this blog post, I’m only going to invite more people to jump in and enjoy the water.
However, I don’t want you to simply take my word for it. I want to give you the gift of Ren, and I’m willing to lose your attention for you to accept it now. If you haven’t watched “Hi, Ren” yet, please click on the video below and get totally lost in it. Then, when you are ready, I invite you to return to this post to hear why I believe this is an important song, artist and cultural moment.
Now, go on, immerse yourself … I promise I’ll still be here when you’re ready to return!
Please Share Your Thoughts In the Comments
How was it? If you’d like, before proceeding with reading, I’d be thrilled if you shared your initial thoughts in the Comments of this article.
My Initial Reaction
Let me flashback to two Sundays ago, January 15, 2023, a day that I will forever refer to as BR1 (Before Ren, Day 1). There I was, beginning my before-bed wind down when I decided to give my front page on YouTube one last perusal to see if anything fun, entertaining, and not too energizing would catch my eye.
Ah, how about this one? I thought, looking at the thumbnail for the video below. After all, I knew it was from one of the music channels that I’ve been delighted by in recent months, hosted by a witty, knowledgeable, generous musician named Justin Hawkins, and that it was in the genre of “reaction videos” that have been a go-to for me since discovering them in early 2020.
Maybe I should have looked closer at what the musician was wearing: some sort of institutional garb that suggested some kind of sickness. Maybe that would have clued me in that this wasn’t going to be the rollicking ride down Easy Street to tuck me into bed with a kiss on my cheek that I was seeking. Or maybe I should have actually believed the click-bait title’s language of “mind-blowing” and “sensational.”
Because 10 minutes later, I was completely jazzed. “WTF did I just experience?” I asked myself. Oh, not that much, just 2.4 bazillion emotions, most of them mingling all at once, and a musical performance that both called up a classic minstrel and gave hints of where music could be heading. It felt like some sort of acoustic-rap-troubadour version of “Stairway to Heaven,” but instead of immersion into the mystical mountains of Tolkien, I had been cast back into the Garden of Eden, where two very compelling, archetypal characters — -call them Chaos and Hope — engage in a harrowing dialogue with existential implications, full of musical playfulness, madness, breakdowns, and breakthroughs.
To put it succinctly, I was gobsmacked by “Hi, Ren” and Ren Gill. Where had this been all my life?
The Ecstatic Community Reaction to Ren
There have only been a few times in my life when I became instantly enraptured by a musician, and most of them happened when I was younger such as when I discovered Nirvana in the fall of 1991 as a college freshman. That’s perfectly normal because the older one gets the more music one has heard so it becomes harder to find something new or something deep enough to really stir the soul.
Yet I’ve read dozens of comments from us middle-aged and elderly folks responding to Ren’s work in the same way I have, where we all feel like standing on our own two feet and calling ourselves hope. Here’s one from a 91-year-old woman named Ethel Sky-Hultberg on a friend’s Facebook page:
“I first heard Ren ( Hi Ren)) several years ago while browsing YouTube. A powerful intelligent resourceful musician vibrating before a street audience obviously captivated by a truly heart-rending-eclectic performance. His integrity, authenticity and musicality is a powerful boost to my feelings of hope for this generation’s transformative possibilities. At 91, I’m thrilled to be able to feel this way. His spirit is strong and should go a long way to nourishing his health. Sending him good vibes.” (Bolded emphasis mine)
Here’s another, this one in the “Hi, Ren” comments section from a YouTube user named Bill Hughes that has been liked over 4,000 times, including by Ren:
“I’m just a 73-year-old man who over my years on this earth has learned to appreciate all forms and styles of music. I rarely comment on the majority of artists I have stumbled upon in my search for good music but you sir are one of those very rare artists that I’ve heard who can span the distance of age. Your music, style, and emotion in your performance is refreshing to this old man and my belief in the younger generation of musical artists. I look very much forward to listening to more of your creations, for they are not mere songs that you share, they are life.” (Bolded emphasis mine)
Now perhaps my vision of how much of an impact Ren is making or will make has been distorted by my two-week deep dive. After all, after being signed by a label in 2015 but then dropped because of his worsening illness, Ren remains independent. Ren, where are your interviews with Oprah, bro? (Sorry, bad joke!)
Perhaps, though, that’s more a reflection of Oprah and her team than of Ren. Maybe they need to cast their nets more widely and seek out independent artists. Or perhaps those interviews are coming.
Personally, I hope Ren stays independent so he can have total freedom to experiment with how he makes his art interact with the world of commerce. I came from the West Coast hippie music scene and thus know successful bands like the Grateful Dead and Phish built much of their success by allowing fans to freely tape and trade their live performances. Thus I believe that Ren’s success-through-word-of-mouth model has precedence and even more potential in the age of the Internet. In other words, the old models are dying and new ones are being created every day, so don’t limit how you create your abundance!
All of that said, I’d be surprised if Ren doesn’t get signed in 2023. Regardless of what business model he uses, judging from the various reactions to “Hi, Ren” and how in the two weeks of working on this blog post it had 800,000 views to bring it to 3.7 million total, I’m reasonably sure the hype train is comin’ and I’m happy to apply to be its conductor (or even work in the coal car!).
Having said all of that, I have one concern about what this hype might do. After reflecting on the biographies of 1970s superstars like Freddie Mercury and Elton John because of the movies “Bohemian Rhapsody” and “Rocket Man,” it’s clear that fan adulation can go to a musician’s head, often derailing promising careers.
However, the lyrics in “Hi, Ren” where his Dark side speaks about how he wants to “be a big deal, the next Jimi Hendrix” and how he has a “God complex” shows Ren Gill is wrestling with this issue on a very deep level. And this self-awareness gives me hope that Ren will handle fame better than the aforementioned musicians.
Clearly, by writing these “Hi, Ren” posts, I want people to discover and support Ren and his art. However, I want to elevate the fan-artist relationship. For fans, how can we praise artists in a way that gives them respect but doesn’t cause their feet to fly off the ground? For artists, how can you receive praise and remain grounded in your humanity?
I’m sending prayers toward Ren to help him navigate this challenge. Looking at his work, the conclusion of “Hi, Ren” and what he’s been through already, I believe he will.
Ren’s Health Narrative: Inspiring the Weak to Be Strong
As a young man, Ren Gill has been through some extremely challenging health issues, including Lyme’s disease which wasn’t properly diagnosed for years, and these experiences inform the depth and empathy of songs like “Hi, Ren,” his “The Tale of Jenny & Screech” trilogy and his newest, “Sick Boi.”
“There are so many people who are going through chronic illness things that need to hear that there are stories of people moving past it,” Ren says in this brief conversation with one of his musical collaborators, “because when I was in it, all I wanted to do was seek out stories of people who had gotten better.”
Just so you can get a taste of how hard things were for Ren, this video below is of him talking several years ago when he was extremely sick and in chronic pain and yet he says, “I wanna be alive SO MUCH.” If you have time, do yourself a favor and read through some of the comments to see just how much of a positive impact sharing this vulnerable video is having on people.
Of course, as humans, we are more than just our bodies. We are also mind and spirit. While I haven’t faced the physical health challenges Ren has, because I almost lost my life to addiction in my 20s and had some challenges with what I call bipolar condition in my 40s, I can relate to the mental health issues and the spiritual dilemma that are at the core of “Hi, Ren.” In addition, in songs like “Money Game, Part 2” (especially his ingenious 10-part “nursery rhyme” explaining the corruption of business models), Ren shows that, like me, he finds it hard to stay sane in a society that all too often feels structurally crazy.
Fortunately, instead of caving into all of these challenges, Ren is channeling his experiences into art and offering a beautiful, inspiring gift to the world. By doing this, he is tapping into the archetype of the Wounded Healer, sharing his physical and mental health challenges authentically and vulnerably, exposing his wounds and thus telling those suffering that we are not alone, and while we may feel weak, we can remain strong.
One of the main reasons I’m doing this deep dive blog dive into Ren’s work is to remind us not to undersell the impact we can make if we put our mind to it. We all have life lessons that we can tap into and share, our unique medicine that can help heal the world.
Dancing With Our Demons and Our Angels, Loving Our Humanity: Some Psychological and Spiritual Lessons of “Hi, Ren”
In my opinion, the psychological and spiritual lessons of “Hi, Ren,” may be the most important thing about the song, so I will dive deeper into them in a coming post.
Judging by many reaction videos to “Hi, Ren,” most people can relate to having an Inner Critic deflating one’s dreams and many understand the idea of the Devil on one shoulder and the Angel on the other that Ren has turned into a song. Ren smartly does this by sharing the details of how this battle expresses itself in his voice and relates to his experiences while saying in the closing monologue that this struggle is inherent to the human condition. And then, in a very poignant way, he lands on the solution:
Recognize that both Dark and Light exist within us and to learn to dance with these energies and find creative power in doing that dance, lest our setting them at war with each other lead to our self-destruction.
In this way, the message of “Hi, Ren” seems very much to be the message that the Jungian psychologist Paul Levy has taken from doing over a decade worth of work examining the Native American concept of Wetiko. Levy defines it as a “a psycho-spiritual disease of the Soul that afflicts humanity” in this 3-minute video.
Key to understanding it is recognizing that it both exists within all of us but also exists independently of us. In some ways, it’s almost like it comes pre-packaged with the operating system of human consciousness. Thus, it’s not “all just in your head” but it’s also not some Spirit that exists beyond us; in fact, it needs human consciousness to “exist.”
Wetiko is a very challenging concept to hone in on, but cultures all over the world have their form of it.
When Ren does his Dark side voice, that is the voice of Wetiko. Its purpose is to take over our consciousness, to use humanity as a vehicle for destruction and chaos. And it is very, very good at it.
Levy says one thing to understand is that “(Wetiko) has NO creative power at all, but it is a master impersonator.” Now, consider how Wetiko Ren frequently stops his rap to do impersonations! Also, understand these impersonations are always done in the service of mocking and knocking down Ren. Yet the reason they work is that they are the voice of doubt that we all hear, they prey on our insecurities.
The only way the fully human Ren, the one who knows this Wetiko is inside of him but isn’t him, can lose himself to Wetiko is if he believes what Wetiko is saying about Ren.
“As soon as we identify with (Wetiko’s) version of ourselves, then it has us,” Levy says.
In the end, Wetiko is all bluster. Compelling as it can be in “Hi, Ren,” it’s not the truth of who Ren is. That said, it isn’t something one can kill or lock inside. To deny the existence of Wetiko ironically empowers it and we see that in its intense break down of who it is and its long history co-existing inside human consciousness. However, its big lie comes at the end of the breakdown when it yells, “I am YOU, REN!”
Fortunately, Ren Gill doesn’t believe it. As he says at the end of “Hi, Ren,” he is human, we are human, we are not demons (Wetiko), angels or even gods. We must remain humble and recognize that Wetiko exists inside of us and to learn to dance with it. Don’t kill it, disarm it with creativity and humility and yes, gratitude for our humanity.
We are human. And that is a beautiful, multi-faceted thing.
(END PART I)
“Hi, Ren” Examined (Pt. 2: The Reactions)
Watching the Reaction Videos to “Hi, Ren” Is Helping Me Fall (Back) In Love with Humanity
Since I was a small child, I’ve been able to love people of all shapes, sizes, and types. Twice, however, that love has been challenged big time.
The first was in my early 20s when my illusions about the ways of the world were shattered too quickly and I fell into cynicism and tried to drown my pain with mind-altering substances. The second was over the past few years when people I thought I’d built solid friendships with over many years began to disown me because my reaction to the COVID-19 situation was different than theirs.
Fortunately, in this second instance, I was thrown a life preserver in the form of the genre known as Reaction Videos. Music has always been a salve for my wounded heart, and throughout 2020 watching this man‘s generous soul and sharing his love for music as he discovered songs I’ve long cherished helped keep me from falling back into the dark cynicism of my early 20s. His motto, “Be a good human” is one I do my best with, and it’s also one I keep in mind when I find others for the first time, believing that at our core we are all beautiful, unique beings worthy of love and respect.
That said, I’m not perfect. I was reminded of that several days into my three-week burrow through the glorious rabbit hole of reaction videos to the musical and visual masterpiece, “Hi, Ren.” You see, after watching a series of these reaction videos I had the thought, “Watching these reaction videos is helping me fall (back) in love with humanity.”
And then, on the very next video I viewed, of this mother and her son, that thought was put to the test when I found myself judging the mother. For no good reason, I was struggling to feel that love for her. This woman hadn’t done anything to me. But there I was, looking down on her. I’m far, far from perfect, and my heart is far, far from completely open. That’s okay. It hurts to say, but I admit it.
So I continued to watch. The first beautiful thing was connecting with the son’s embarrassment at the start when Ren is, as she puts it, doing his “Mary Poppins thing.” You see, I can clearly remember being a teen and sharing music that meant something to me with my parents and feeling embarrassed when they didn’t react as positively as I had. So, for that first part of the song, I focused on and empathized with the son.
Meanwhile, as Ren starts rapping, she starts to get it and, well, the next 10 minutes are an absolute delight. Another gift I’ve received from watching all these reaction videos to Ren’s work is having my appreciation for rap grow. It’s strange that I’ve had this barrier to rap because I’ve always loved rhythm, cadence and wordplay — it’s one of the reasons I read and write poetry.
Anyway, I can tell this woman seriously loves rap and that made me open more to it and open more to her. By the end of the video, I thought these were two of the most authentic, cool reactors I’d met yet. (I only wish they’d had the full video with the monologue!). I also very much appreciate her vulnerability in sharing about her mental health struggles. Keep it up with the videos, you two!
Now, after watching close to 50 “Hi, Ren” reaction videos, the rest of this post will focus on some of my favorites. However, before I share them, I’d like to give some background about Ren Gill and share some of his struggles, because it will help illuminate why so many are reacting so positively to his work.
About Ren Gill
In my overview of the impact of “Hi, Ren”, I wrote:
(Ren Gill is) the following and so much more: a British singer-songwriter and rapper; a phenomenal guitarist; a writer of ingenious rhymes, perfectly-timed beats, and theatrical lyrics; a musical bard and a storytelling genius; a deep Soul diver and Lyme’s Disease survivor who has been through the wringer; and a singer of emotional range from the highest joys to the most crushing pains.
A few days after writing that post, in the comments of this reaction video, YouTube user Jens Randolff shared the following about Ren’s evolving health challenges:
“Ren pursued a career in music from an early age. In 2009, while studying music performance at Bath Spa University, he began to experience health issues and was struggling to attend his lectures. In 2010, he was signed by Sony Records and was working on an album when his health deteriorated to the point where he was unable to continue and subsequently dropped by Sony.
His illness often kept him in bed for up to 23 hours a day. Ren was initially diagnosed with depression, bipolar disorder, and chronic fatigue syndrome. It would take seven years before a doctor in Belgium finally correctly diagnosed Ren with autoimmunity, Lyme disease, and resulting damage to the brain, organs, and joints. Ren eventually underwent stem cell therapy in the United States, which improved his health, but it has not been a cure.
He is currently in Canada for more treatments and will have to be there for at least six months. Ren’s Canadian doctor discovered that Ren has also developed a condition called Mast Cell Activation Disorder, which has affected the myelin sheath in his brain, his thyroid, adrenals, and his bones.
Ren stated: “It’s a lot to wrap my head around having to be away from friends, family, and a successful career, and almost feels like a total juxtaposition to the fact that my music is blowing up right now and spreading to all corners of the world, but that’s life, we take the good with the bad.”
Randolff concluded, “Let’s keep supporting Ren and not pull a “Sony” on him as he undergoes his treatment. Check out his channel, listen to some of his earlier work, like and comment on his performances, and let’s lift Ren’s spirits. If you are a believer, pray for him. Ren is an artist with something to say to this generation, and his work is needed in these troubling times.” (emphasis mine)
Thank you for this summary, Jenns, and I very much agree with your conclusion.
Why Reaction Vids to “Hi, Ren” Are Inspiring Me
There is a method to my madness in using that post from a fellow fan of Ren. You see, ever since I first used the Internet in the mid-1990s, I’ve intuited that it could be used to create a world — and yes, economy — much more based on cooperation and connection than on competition and winners and losers.
I’ve been disheartened at times that this potential hasn’t manifested, but the community reaction to Ren from fans, reactors and Ren himself has rekindled my hope. Perhaps I was just impatient, or perhaps it’s been growing all along. Regardless, I love the idea of co-creating together, supporting each other across platforms so that we are all elevated.
What I Want From Reaction Videos and Why “Hi, Ren” is Special
For me, these are the five things I most want to see in reaction videos:
1. Genuine emotional reaction;
2. Some life wisdom inspired by the video;
3. Creative analysis of the song/artist/video;
4. Humor, funny comments, facial expressions, etc. and
5. most importantly, the reactor’s humanity shining through.
For the most part, every reaction video to “Hi, Ren” I’ve watched has had at least two of these and some have had all five because most songs don’t result in such a widespread, consistent overflow of positivity because most songs aren’t “Hi, Ren.” My journey watching these reactors has been a delight, often resulting in insight into the song and, more often than not, leaving me feeling inspired from witnessing the reactor’s emotional metamorphosis as the song reaches its climactic end and Ren delivers that deep ode to humanity in the closing monologue.
By sharing links to many reaction videos, I’m inviting you to take a similar journey, especially if “Hi, Ren” is a song and performance you don’t mind seeing and hearing many times. I believe the experience of seeing the reactions to this song by people with very different backgrounds and unique perspectives is a project that will lift your spirits and broaden your empathy.
Last, Ren’s work and life suggest the more open and vulnerable we are, the higher the highs and the lower the lows we can feel. Another way of saying that is, the more we allow ourselves to feel, the wider that pendulum’s swing can be, or the larger that eternal dance floor can be. My feeling is that, in general, the reactors in these videos who express the most emotions are likely the most open and vulnerable and thus can relate in a more visible way to “Hi, Ren” and probably any art that moves them.
A Long List of Reaction Videos to “Hi, Ren” That I Loved
By no means are the following the only great Reaction Videos to “Hi, Ren,” they are just some of my favorites (I’ve put links to the videos in the text and thumbnails at the bottom of each favorite):
I’d never seen this guy before but it’s very touching to watch how moved he is by “Hi Ren” — -and I shared a few tears and laughs with him as he tried not to become overwhelmed by his emotions.
Also, it’s super cool to see that Ren posted a really nice reply in the comments and they exchanged some great words. This is something I’ve seen Ren do with a lot of these reaction videos. Again, this points to why my hope for the humanizing potential of the Internet has been rekindled through this project.
I really love how this woman has both an earnest emotional reaction to “Hi, Ren” and offers psychological insight, too. She’s one of the reactors whose channel I am now happily following.
Besides Chief’s reaction, this next one probably hit me the hardest. I think it relates to what I said about the people who have been through the biggest challenges probably will react the strongest to “Hi, Ren.” It also might be that this gal just has a really amazing, expressive face. Either way, it’s priceless. Get your tissues ready.
I really love the fullness of this next one, the way the reactor is clearly moved by the music and lyrics, how he appreciates the performance, and then how he takes the time to find a different metaphor than Ren’s that says the same thing: Rather than fighting with the Devil, learn to dance with it becomes rather than struggling against the current of the River, learn to flow with it. As a Nature boy, I told this British reactor, “Good one, mate!”
Watch this bro get gobsmacked, bro! This one makes my list because I love how much time he takes with the song and he has a self-deprecating, endearing sense of humor and self. He also picks up on a key line from the ending monologue, “There were no real winners or losers in psychological warfare, only victims and students.” In that lyric, Ren shows he shifted from victim mode (which also has him playing bully and Savior) and entered into the healthier way we can relate to our challenges — -as things we can learn from and thus grow into something so much better.
“This boy is preaching the Gospel here,” this pastor says as he pauses Ren after he stands on his own two feet, because Ren was “made by His hand, it’s all part of His plan.” “But he’s doing it in the most amazing way. That’s great,” the pastor continues. Love that this man delved into the spiritual side of “Hi, Ren.”
Okay, this is the last of my list of favorites: At this point of the following video, this reactor has, so far, the most intense and understanding reaction of what I think is one of the most profound lines from the monologue, “The more intensely the light shines, the darker the shadow is.”
When I witnessed that I had the thought, not for the first time over the past several years: The reason we are seeing so much darkness and Shadow in the world, is because our light, the Light, is growing.
Best of the Rest
Now, over the past several days, I’ve slowed up in watching “Hi, Ren” reaction videos. But there are still lots of good ones, new ones are being made every day, and some are listed below (this time without the thumbnails to shorten the blog). If you have a favorite I’ve missed, please post it in the Comments! Like the ones above, you can click on the text link to watch them. Here they are:
Besides saying things like “Powerful,” “heavy on my heart,” “a bit traumatized by the pig at the start,” “one thing that stood out was hope,” she’s pretty much rendered speechless.
Two bros (cousins?) love this “excellent art,” and make the Gollum/Smeagle LOTR connection. “This is the song of the year, of 2022!” “It feels like a play, a performance.” “This guy’s a genius!”
A psychotherapist jives with Ren’s message of the eternal dance inside human nature.
Two metalheads are “captivated.”
Two hip-hop fans give a standing ovation for this song that was “creative and true.”
These two love the pendulum metaphor for life that Ren shares in the monologue, because “as dark as it gets, it will get equally as light.”
This rapper shares how his experiences with that negative voice of depression connect him to Ren, sheds a tear and lands on, “Yo, let’s go with hope. Hell yeah.” Hell yeah for hope, indeed.
Yet another who is astonished at the art, but the first to compare “Hi, Ren” to Van Gogh. Nah, man, I’ve got no problems with it, either. After all, it’s easy to forget that great works of art and their artists had contemporaries who, if they were paying attention, could have been living witnesses to the birth of that art. Ironically, such was not the case for Van Gogh. I’m grateful we aren’t making the same mistake with Ren and “Hi, Ren.”
This vocal coach not only has a well-produced channel, he shares some nice insights and, at the end, gives some good information on Lyme’s Disease and what Ren has been through.
I hope you enjoyed this post and, even more, some of these wonderful reaction videos to this amazing, inspiring song. In future posts, I hope to share more of this kind of stuff, moments when art breaks open my heart, because I really do feel humanity’s biggest challenge is more in matters of the heart than the head.
(END PART II)
“Hi, Ren” Examined (Pt. 3: The Psychology)
Some Psychological Lessons of “Hi, Ren” Through the Lens of Wetiko
An Overview of Wetiko and How “Hi, Ren” Is a Blueprint For Understanding It
I believe “Hi, Ren,” by British musician Ren Gill, is a musical and visual masterpiece that is breaking open the hearts of those who engage with it. Like any profound work of art, it can be approached from a multitude of perspectives. In this post, I’m focusing on the lyrics of the song to examine its psychological and spiritual meaning through the lens of Wetiko, a term drawn from Native American cultures and defined by author and shamanic healer Paul Levy as a “contagious psycho-spiritual disease of the soul.”
Levy has written three books and countless articles on Wetiko, and a fourth book is in the works, so narrowing it down is a huge challenge. However, humans around the world and throughout time have attempted to name it: the Devil of Christianity, Iblis in Islam, the Shadow of Carl G. Jung are just a few.
In my first “Hi, Ren” post, I wrote that “In some ways, it’s almost like Wetiko comes pre-packaged with the operating system of human consciousness” and that “when Ren does his Dark side voice, that is the voice of Wetiko. Its purpose is to take over our consciousness, to use humanity as a vehicle for destruction and chaos.”
In Levy’s article, “Wetiko in a Nutshell,” he writes,
Wetiko disease is, in its essence, to have fallen into a state of mistaken identity, and the best medicine for wetiko is to know who we are. (emphasis mine)
Our true nature, our true identity — who we really are — is impervious to wetiko’s pernicious influence. Wetiko can’t take over, possess or have any effect on our true nature, which is not an object that can be manipulated or possessed by Wetiko (or anything else, for that matter). For this reason, Wetiko’s strategy is to set up a substitute counterfeit version — a simulation — of ourselves. It then tricks us into identifying with this fraudulent version of ourselves. Wetiko cannot stand it when we identify with our true nature as creative beings, for then it has nothing to sink its roots — and fangs — into.
In this way, Wetiko is a master impersonator which latches onto our doubts and insecurities and gives them voice in an attempt to disempower who we truly are so that it, Wetiko, can manifest itself through us.
By creating a dialogue with Wetiko, “Hi, Ren” is one blueprint for us to face Wetiko inside of ourselves. When we don’t do this inner work, we often project it onto the Other through the age-old practice of scapegoating and this leads to many of our worst social maladies. For example, Levy writes “the human activity of war is a particularly virulent incarnation of the Wetiko bug writ large on the world stage” and with things heating up geopolitically I believe the more of us who courageously do this inner work, the less likely our species will spin out into another period of collective insanity known as a world war.
At its core, “Hi, Ren” shows an artist who has found the medicine for Wetiko. He does this by engaging in an archetypal battle to wrestle his identity from Wetiko’s grip and then proclaiming his creative, true nature as who he, Ren Gill, truly is. By sharing this with the world, Ren inspires listeners/viewers to consider taking a similar path.
The meat of this post uses the lyrics of “Hi, Ren” to dig into this archetypal dialogue with Wetiko. By doing so, I hope to bring Wetiko into greater awareness so that we all have a better chance to both stop it from turning us into destructive monsters under its control and to help us realize that engaging with Wetiko can lead us to our salvation.
Ren - Hi Ren
Ren, you sound more insane than I doYou think that those doctors are really there to guide you?Been through this a…genius.com
Examining the Lyrics of “Hi, Ren”
At the start of the music video for “Hi, Ren,” Ren is wheeled into what appears to be some kind of institution run by matter-of-fact humanoids wearing pig masks. We see nothing but the title of the song, “Hi Ren,” in all white letters on a black background before Ren opens the song by showing us his guitar and vocal chops. Then, after settling into a rhythm, Ren begins the main event by stepping into the voice of Wetiko in this first stanza:
Hi there Ren
It’s been a little while
Did you miss me?
You thought you’d buried me, didn’t you? Risky…
’Cause I always come back
Deep down you know that
Deep down you know I’m always in periphery
Ren, aren’t you pleased to see me?
It’s been weeks since we spoke, bro, I know you need me
You’re the sheep, I’m the shepherd
Not your place to lead me
Not your place to be biting off the hand that feeds me
Throughout “Hi, Ren” Wetiko proves itself a habitual liar. “I know you need me” is the first lie as we do not need Wetiko, it needs us. In fact, the final line “not your place to be biting off the hand that feeds me” speaks to Wetiko recognizing this — -we feed it, not vice versa.
Some reactors in reaction videos to “Hi, Ren” try to write off Ren’s artistic “battle with his subconscious” as mental illness, schizophrenia, or multiple personality disorder. While I certainly don’t want to downplay the serious nature of mental illness, or suggest this interpretation is completely incorrect, I believe Ren Gill is doing something deeper here.
By having this conversation out in the open, he shows psychological maturity, a recognition that by disassociating himself from Wetiko he can see clearly that Wetiko is not him, not Ren Gill in his fullness. And this process is what allows him to come to the understanding he shares in his monologue at the end of the song. Now, such a process is not for the faint of heart, but perhaps when mental health professionals pathologize those of us who chose creative ways of facing Wetiko, they may be making a mistake.
Stanza two is Ren’s first response:
Hi Ren, I’ve been taking some time to be distant
I’ve been taking some time to be still
I’vе been taking some time to be by mysеlf
since my therapist told me I’m ill
And I’ve been making some progress lately,
and I’ve learnt some new coping skills
So I haven’t really needed you much, man
I think we need to just step back and chill
There’s a lot going on here. First, this version of Ren is disempowered — he’s following the judgment of his therapist, who calls him ill, and he says that he’s making progress as a result of following the therapist. He then suggests that in the past he has needed Wetiko, but is now asking it to step aside.
However, this leaves a wide-open window for Wetiko to climb through and manipulate in the following stanza:
Ren, you sound more insane than I do
You think that those doctors are really there to guide you?
Been through this a million times
Your civilian mind is so perfect at always being lied to
Okay, take another pill, boy!
Drown yourself in the sound of white noise
Follow this ten-step program, rejoice!
All your problems will be gone! Fucking dumb boy!
Ren Gill has spoken about how his health issues have been misdiagnosed and his song “Sick Boi,” which he released several weeks after “Hi, Ren,” expresses some of the rage he has felt as a result. Wetiko — because it’s along for the ride inside of us — knows Ren has serious doubts about professional therapy, which is what he feeds off in this stanza. In addition, it then degrades Ren (“your civilian mind is so perfect at always being lied to”) before running through a list of steps Ren has taken and the promises they didn’t deliver before going harder with his first serious insult — “Fucking dumb boy!”
But Ren isn’t going to give in easily. He responds:
Nah, mate, this time it’s different man, trust me
I feel like things might be falling in place
And my music’s been kinda doing bits, too
Like I actually might do something great
And when I’m gone, maybe I’ll be remembered
For doing something special with myself
That’s why I don’t think that we should talk, man
’Cause when you’re with me, it never seems to help
I’ve noticed many reactors in reaction videos nodding along in appreciation of this part. Whether or not one has faced serious health challenges like Ren, I think most humans connect to this struggle inside ourselves between our doubt and our confidence. I know I do. And I think we all want to do something special with ourselves and so to hear an artist give voice to those hopes is inspiring, indeed.
However, this really pisses Wetiko off, so it really digs into its Big Lie in the next stanza, not even playing guitar to make sure Ren totally hears what it says:
You think that you can amputate me?
I am you, you are me, you are I, I am we
We are one, split in two, that makes one, so you see:
You got to kill you if you wanna kill me!
Now that Wetiko has Ren’s attention, it begins its aggressive strumming on the guitar and joyfully raps:
I’m not leftover dinner, I’m not scraps on the side
Oh, your music is thriving? Delusional guy!
Where’s your Top Ten hit?
Where’s your interview with Oprah?
Where are your Grammy’s Ren?
Nowhere!
In this stanza, Wetiko is appealing to our ego’s need for recognition and popularity. He links Ren’s musical success to that need, saying the lack of traditional measuring sticks for musical success proves Ren is a “delusional guy” when he says his music is thriving.
Ren Gill, though, clearly has had this conversation with himself outside of “Hi, Ren” and so he has a response ready:
Yeah, but, my music’s not commercial like that
I never chased numbers, statistics or stats
I never write hooks for the radio
They never even play me,
so why would I concern myself with that?
But my music is really connecting
And the people who find it respect it
And for me, that’s enough
’Cause this life’s been tough
so it gives me a purpose I can rest in
At the start, with the “yeah” — the first time Ren has affirmed something Wetiko said — we see that Wetiko is making some progress. Still, Ren finds it inside of himself to define success as making music that is “connecting” with others and that earns respect from those who find it, giving him a “purpose he can rest in.”
In a world and economic system where finding purpose that is in service to humanity can be extremely challenging, this alone shows that Ren Gill has won an important battle.
Wetiko is by no means done, however. It’s going to keep trying, so it responds with:
Man, you sound so pretentious!
Ren, your music is so self-centered
No one wants to hear another song about how much you hate yourself, trust me…
Considering that Ren has been speaking positively about himself, this might be Wetiko’s weakest attempt yet, though I think it is perhaps speaking to a former version of Ren, digging at old wounds. Still, Wetiko seems to realize its mistake and so it then goes for the argument about why Ren needs it:
You should be so lucky,
having me inside you to guide you,
remind you to manage expectations
Provide you perspective,
that thing you neglected, I get it
You wanna be a big deal…
Next Jimi Hendrix? Forget it
That’s right — you need Wetiko to keep your God complex in check, Ren! It’s both funny and frightening to see how this parasite of the mind so fluidly switches directions. Furthermore, it even tries to show it has empathy for Ren, offering a faked understanding with the “I get it” part. The only reason Wetiko suggest it gets it is not because it empathizes with us as humans but because it is a form of egoic consciousness which thrives on being put on a pedestal. In fact, before coming across the concept of Wetiko, Levy referred to it as ME — malignant egophrenia.
Now, Ren Gill is starting to sound desperate and the speed of the conflict picks up:
Man, it’s not like that
Wetiko comes back:
Man, it’s just like that, I’m inside you, you twat!
Ren tries again:
No, it’s not, man you’re wrong, when I write I belong
But Wetiko now has another trick in its pitchfork:
Let me break the fourth wall by acknowledging this song:
Ren sits down, has a stroke of genius
He wants to write a song that was not done previous
A battle with his subconscious…
Eminem did it
Ren interjects:
Played on guitar?
Wetiko is quick to respond…
Plan B did it!
…and then goes for another Big Lie, delivered in the most aggressive rap of the song:
Man you’re not original, you criminal, rip-off artist
The pinnacle of your success is stealing other people’s material
Ren, mate, we’ve heard it all before
Oh, “She sells sea shells on the sea shore”
Why is this a Big Lie? Well, because Wetiko itself is the real rip-off artist and its only “success” is stealing the consciousness of humanity, our material. It cannot and does not exist without our acquitting to its theft.
Also, it tries to twist the knife with the mocking, “Oh, ‘She sells sea shells on the sea shore,” a reference to an extremely creative, ingenious piece of Ren’s excellent “Money Game, Part 2,” where Ren uses the metaphor of selling sea shells to describe the many lies our economic system is based on. Wetiko knows Ren is very proud of this song and that it was a successful track for him (almost 8 million views on YouTube) and thus tries to take all of that away from Ren, saying it’s just another example of him being a rip-off artist.
Ren responds, and you can hear the hurt in his voice,
Fuck you! I don’t need you, I don’t need to hear this
’Cause I’m fine by myself, I’m a genius!
And I will be great,
and I will make waves,
and I’ll shake up the whole world beneath us
As Levy writes, this is just another side of Wetiko. It’s like Wetiko tricked Ren here, with how it “conjures up a stunted image of ourselves as being limited, wounded, (and) having problems,” leading Ren to move to “the opposite — being inflated and grandiose,” speaking about himself in almost god-like terms.
Not surprisingly, this pleases Wetiko, as he responds:
That’s right, speak your truth!
Your fucking god complex leaks out of you
It’s refreshing to actually hear you say it!
Instead of downplay it…
“Oh, music is all about the creative process and if people can find something to relate to within that, then that’s just a bonus”
Your truth? Nah, Wetiko, that’s what you want us to believe. But then before Ren even has a chance to ponder what it’s said it feeds off something Ren Gill has likely said in the past and it does it in a mocking voice, an attempt to both humiliate and kill any humility in Ren Gill the artist.
At this point, Ren has had enough; there’s no reasoning with Wetiko, so he says:
Fuck you! I’mma fucking kill you, Ren
Here, Wetiko seems to feel that at the very least, this battle will result in a draw, which is another way of saying it might lose Ren Gill as a host for its consciousness but Ren Gill won’t be able to cast it aside and step into his fullness as a human being. After all, it knows that Ren can’t kill him without killing himself as it stated earlier in the song. So it goads Ren:
Well, fucking kill me then! Let’s fucking have you, Ren
And so Ren talks himself into it:
I’mma do it, watch me prove it,
who are you to doubt my music?
’Cause I call the shots, I choose if you die
Yeah, I call the shots and so I choose who survives
I’ll tie you up in knots when I lock you inside
We see Ren act this out, appearing to suck the energy of Wetiko into himself…
….tensing his whole body and then, seconds later with the lights in the room flickering quickly, Wetiko returns, with absolutely no sign of Ren, for his grandiose proclamation:
News flash…
I was created at the dawn of creation
I am temptation
I am the snake in Eden
I am the reason for treason
Beheading all kings,
I am sin with no rhyme or reason
Sun of the morning, Lucifer, Antichrist
Father of Lies, Mestophales
Truth in a blender, deceitful pretender
The banished avenger, the righteous surrender
(A brief aside: Ren’s guitar playing throughout “Hi, Ren” does an amazing job adding to the mood of the story and this section, where he almost seems to relish galloping into a Primus-esque heavy metal ascent, is, for me, one of the highlights.)
When standing in front of my solar eclipse
My name, it is stitched to your lips, so you see
I won’t bow to the will of a mortal, feeble and normal
You wanna kill me? I’m eternal, immortal
I live in every decision that catalyzed chaos
That causes division
I live inside death, the beginning of ends
I am you, you are me, I am you, Ren!
There it is at the end, the Ultimate Lie: “I am you, Ren!” Fortunately, even after that destructive outburst, somehow the guitar quietly descends, and the real Ren Gill emerges:
Hi Ren…
I’ve been taking some time to be distant
I’ve been taking some time to be still
I’ve been taking some time to be by myself
and I’ve spent half my life ill
Notice the difference from the first stanza. Instead of his therapist telling him he’s ill, he takes responsibility for his illness. And that is key: we can’t step into our true power until we take full responsibility for our situation. As Ren says in the closing monologue, “As I got older, I realized there were no real winners and there were no real losers in psychological warfare. But there were victims and there were students.” In this stanza he suggests the movement from victim to student. Which is what allows him to share the following:
But just as sure as the tide starts turning
Just as sure as the night has dawn
Just as sure as the rainfall soon runs dry
when you stand in an eye of a storm
I was made to be tested and twisted
I was made to be broken and beat
I was made by His hand,
it’s all part of His plan
that I stand on my own two feet
For the first time in the song, Ren is identifying himself as being connected to something Greater, recognizing that his life path, his studies if you will, are “all part of His plan” and that plan includes that he overcome this struggle, that he stand up and proclaim:
And you know me, my will is eternal
And you know me, you’ve met me before
Face to face with a beast,
I will rise from the east
and I’ll settle on the ocean floor
And I go by many names also
Some people know me as hope
Some people know me
as the voice that you hear
when you loosen the noose on the rope
He’s touching something very deep here, this idea that when we reach a point of deciding to kill ourselves, there’s another voice, a voice that, unlike Wetiko, wants us to go on, to be empowered not by falsehood, but by recognizing that our challenges are what make us stronger. And so Ren says,
And you know how I know that I’ll prosper?
’Cause I stand here beside you today
I have stood in the flames
that cremated my brain
and I didn’t once flinch or shake
The forceful way he delivers that last stanza is one of the most powerful moments of the song and so, ever the artist, he realizes he’s got to move beyond his spoken voice and thus bursts into triumphant song with the final stanza:
So cower at the man I’ve become
When I sing from the top of my lungs
That I won’t retire, I’ll stand in your fire
Inspire the meek to be strong
And when I am gone, I will rise
In the music that I left behind
Ferocious, persistent, immortal like you
We’re a coin with two different sides
Here he speaks about the great gift that artists can share with the world: inspiration. And in this way, an artist can be immortal, by singing from the top of his lungs about his connection to the human Spirit. Thus, just as this psycho-spiritual malady known as Wetiko has been with us since the dawn of time and will exist long after our mortal bodies pass, so has and will the human Spirit.
Some Thoughts on the Final Monologue
We can’t finish without speaking to how Ren personalizes the story of “Hi, Ren” in his amazing, vulnerable, and wise spoken outro. He begins:
When I was seventeen years old,
I shouted out into an empty room,
into a blank canvas that I would defeat the forces of evil
And for the next ten years of my life I suffered the consequences…
With autoimmunity illness and psychosis
I’ve watched around fifty Reaction Videos to “Hi, Ren” and this part, I believe, is underappreciated. What Ren is saying here is that it was his psychological war with what he thought was himself but was really Wetiko that caused his body, his immune system, to turn on himself. I strongly believe that one of the real blind spots in our medical system is not understanding just how much of a role our psychology plays in determining our physical condition.
Ren goes on:
As I got older,
I realized there were no real winners
and there were no real losers in psychological warfare
But there were victims
and there were students
It wasn’t David versus Goliath,
it was a pendulum
Eternally swaying from the dark to the light
And the more intensely that the light shone,
the darker the shadow it cast
This is another key line — “The more intensely that the light shone, the darker the shadow it cast.” Levy writes, “It is an archetypal, universal dynamic that as we approach the light, the forces of darkness appear to get stronger and more menacing. Progress in our spiritual path is the very act that stirs up these adversarial forces to attack.” Fortunately, Ren understands the solution, as he finishes with:
It was never really a battle for me to win,
It was an eternal dance,
And like a dance,
the more rigid I became, the harder it got
The more I cursed my clumsy footsteps, the more I struggled
So I got older
And I learned to relax,
and I learned to soften,
and that dance got easier
We cannot defeat Wetiko through warfare. We must learn to dance with and integrate this force. But Ren doesn’t leave this just about him, as he ends with an extremely important, universalizing message:
It is this eternal dance
that separates human beings
from angels, from demons, from gods
And I must not forget,
we must not forget,
that we are human beings
Yes, we are not angels, demons or gods. We are human. And that is a joyous, wondrous thing to be, a gift not to be wasted and, the better we know this, the more we can share this gift through our unique creativity, lifting up others as they go through this human journey. Getting in touch with that creativity and using it from a place of Service is one of two cures for Wetiko.
The second cure? Well, I wrote about it in part two of this series, when I shared that watching reaction videos to “Hi, Ren” was “helping me fall (back) in love with humanity.” Wetiko wants us to feel small, to feel all alone, disconnected from the human family, to feel like we must depend on Wetiko to survive. But “Hi, Ren” shows the process of awakening, recognizing that this is Wetiko’s Big Lie, and finding his humanity as a result. As Levy said on this episode of the Higherside Chats podcast:
When you really tap into that deep awakening, you recognize, ‘Oh, my god, I’m all of it.’ Instead of identifying with the skin-encapsulated ego, with the separate self, you begin to have the realization that you’re not separate. … That’s why the medicine par excellence for Wetiko is compassion because compassion spontaneously is the expression of when we see through the separate self and recognize that we aren’t separate.”
Again, we are not angels, demons or gods. We are human. And that is a wondrous thing to be.
(END PART III, END SERIES)
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